List writing sometimes gets a bad press - perhaps because of the ‘endless hassle’ that To-Do lists create in some people’s minds.
But it doesn’t have to be that way and in fact I use lists as a very powerful process of reinforcing behaviours and feelings that ordinarily would escape my attention - or be soon forgotten. This process has also worked well with some of my coaching clients.
The idea is simplicity itself:
1- Get a small notebook or diary that you can easily carry around without others noticing it.
2- Write down at least one thing each day that made you feel happy. Something you heard, read, felt, touched or smelt. No matter how big or small, write it down and (optionally) any attendant thoughts or feelings.
3- Do this for at least a month and read over your list once a week (or at least once a month). Then, if you feel so inclined, do it again the next month.
It’s easy to be sceptical about activities like this but I find it interesting to note how much some people rely almost unconsciously for their daily dose of journalling from the mass media and advertising industries.
And after observing this ‘data feed’ for a while I noticed how little of it made me happy. All the more reason to begin paying closer attention to what I (little ole me) found attractive and interesting in this world on a regular basis.
From a career coaching perspective this simple list making tool can also be applied in ways that help you notice more of the following:
- What makes you angry at work?
- Which work tasks are you good at?
- Which work tasks are you not good at?
- What could you improve?
- What ’success’ do you want to achieve at work (and in life)?
Over time I’ve noticed that these types of lists are most effective when used with a coach (or a trusting and non judgmental partner / friend), as they become focal points for assessing current realities against desired outcomes.
Because although our dreams and imaginations are important allies in creating a welcoming future they have to be rooted in an understanding of what is practical and possible in the PRESENT moment. From there does change spring.
YOUR HAPPINESS CHALLENGE:
Start your very own happiness list and see how it goes for the next couple of weeks. It should only take about 5 minutes each day.
BTW - I treat my list as private and confidential and therefore sometimes use abbreviations and acronyms to disguise identities and locations.
Bear this in mind if you choose to take your list to your workplace - some discretion is advised.
- Mark McClure
PS - I started my current “Happiness list” on Monday 29 Sept and made a reminder to post about this again sometime in November.
3 Comments
I really like this technique Mark. It’s a way of stock-checking and affirming at the same time. It’s simple, and not trite.
Like most things that fit that description, it’s easy to dismiss them as too simple or obvious. But that’s just putting a block in the way and the tactic of someone who is ruled by fear!
I was thinking, would this have the opposite effect if I wrote down the things daily that made me sad?
Simon,
It’s like the experience where you think about something you’d die for (e.g. a red Porsche!) and then start regularly noticing red Porsches everywhere for a while - isn’t that the brain’s reticular activating system, where we can filter out desired info from the endless sensory data stream that we take as “being alive”?
I don’t think it would do any harm to write out things that make you sad, angry or any other emotion. Might lead to great literature or works of art!
For my own part, I’ve found that even in sadness there is always something to learn, something worth knowing from the experience. (A very simple and powerful approach to noticing our thoughts and feelings is Byron Katie’s “The Work”.)
Hi Mark,
Many thanks. I can really relate to this post.
Earlier this year I commenced a weight loss endeavor (prompted by turning 50) and walk each day wearing a pedometer. I keep a weight loss journal where I record my walks and the number steps each day. I find this gives me motivation and accountability.
[Hello WL,
Yes, me too. There's something about writing a (training) diary - almost like an act of closure for the events of that day. Works for me!
BTW -have you see this? http://www.trekdesk.com/
Mark]
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[...] When Mark was in his 20s he kept a training diary each day for all the running, weight lifting, hill running and hurdling experiences of those young adult years spent as an athlete. Years later he can still look at many of the entries and vividly recall what he was doing, who he was with, how much it hurt (sometimes). Source: http://markmccluretoday.com/update-on-the-october-happiness-list-exercise. [...]
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